To the BATMOBILE

Thursday, February 23, 2006

oh the mundane!

Butlerman admits it. The creative juices have stopped flowing (while other juices still freely... The cries of censorship lie unanswered). My life is no longer as interesting as it once was. Rather, I can't seem for the life of me (pun obviously intended) to make my life interesting for your benefit as much as mine...

The only time my heart managed to quiver a pulse of excitement was when I was thrown into a heated arguement with the 74 bus driver who was adament that a dashing young man such as I did not have 45 cents to pay the bus fare with, after my fully-milked EZ Link card beeped embarassingly as it hit negative 40 dollars (or some other nominal sum). When it became increasingly apparent I was telling the truth, I was still forced to surrender my last 40 cents to travel 3 stops down the road. Superhero pride dictated that I returned later to smack him around his pimply jowls and get the last laugh. Though what really happened was I burst through the windows (the door opened too slowly) as the bus arrived outside my school and made a quick getaway, with the driver screaming after me, "You owe me 5 cent arh? Owe 5 cent, pay 5 cent argh!".

In vain attempt to divert the attention to something other than my hair-raisingly dull life (which I liken to be less interesting than watching paint dry, or even watching TV Mobile), I begin the never ending quest to seek true perfection, something which I was confident I was fast approaching, yet not fully reciprocated in survey results...

Go on then... take part in the survey ! You know you want to...

TO THE BATMOBILE

posted by butler at 10:26 pm
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Tuesday, February 14, 2006

love actually is...

What does a man do when he arrives home to the drudgery of his house, as he settles with the grace of a sack of potatoes into his computer chair, swivels around to face his computer when every other virile male on the face of God's good Earth is busy delivering roses, chocolates, chocolate roses and the like to their significant other?

(Editors note: The initial paragraph was written on valentines day itself... However it was only today which I thought of an answer...)

That particular man, in this case is no ordinary man (but a Butlerman! Cue can laughter, followed by a profound sense of loss as I realise my sense of humour has died), has realised that while listening to Greatest Love Hits 1990 may not exactly soothe his toubled, single (and very lonely) heart, some enjoyment can be derived from publically declaring (via a blog) his absolute inadequacy when it comes to girlfriends. (It is duly noted that such sado-masochism may have turned several candidates away, despite my musclebound physique, charming smile and heroic profile. Whoops?)

As the timeless hit "Show Me The Meaning of Being Lonely" by the Backstreet Boys plays for the 50th time, it has become apparent that my consistent failure to please not only members of the opposite sex, but a group of beings that is especially dear to my heart (Yes yes... Butlerman screws up again), may actually be due to some inherent failure of mine. Time for Butlerman to consider a career shift (or taking up meditation to find ill deserved inner peace in the mountain regions of Nepal, and hopefully a spiritual companion to boot...)

TO THE BATMOBILE

posted by butler at 8:31 pm
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Sunday, February 12, 2006

say what?

Warning! This would probably come close (or if not, it already is) the sketchiest blog post I'd ever have.

Blame me not! Because if it wasn't sketchy, I would never have had the reason to write this post anyway. Hold on to your seats/horses/hairpiece (depending on which era you're from), because this might blow you away! (Just as it did me, albeit on a teensy bit more physical note... Cue cheesy carnival music).

Apparently, on Saturday, the 11th of February, the ACS(I) rugby team was having a small (well...) sparring session against NUS to gain some match practice before the upcoming B division group match on the following Monday, the 13th. During which, I more or less got pummeled into oblivion from behind by an NUS player. Or so I've been told. In my present state, the furthest back I can recall after the supposed incident was when I woke up this morning with my hair cut (I found out I had it done on Friday), my shoulder aching and having strange dreams of having a doctor peering into my eyes.

As things are at the moment, my friends know more about what I did on Saturday than I do myself... And it won't get any better! The doctor said nothing I forgot would come back. Which is a pressing issue as I have an E Math test tomorrow and it seems that being bonked on the head has left me totally oblivious to what I've learned so far, though I won't be surprised if I didn't know anything in the first place...

Villians and crooks beware... Butlerman will get hold of you someday. Right after he (hopefully) scrapes his test and regains sufficient memory to function properly again?

TO THE BATMOBILE

posted by butler at 10:39 pm
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