To the BATMOBILE

Thursday, June 08, 2006

of butterflies and omens

Not too long ago, I made a secret pledge to myself (involving dead children and pentagrams of fire. Just joking) to blog occasionally during the holidays if only to maintain reader interest that is no doubt drawn to the massive homosexual cyber orgy occuring in the critically acclaimed BATFORUM.

As my holidays are boredom epitomised and I have nothing to write about, the pledge has been broken, and the gates of Hell have been opened to pour forth Armaegeddon unleashed and all peace on Earth will cease to exist (if it did exist at some point in time. Not as I know it). In a last ditch attempt to stop the invasion of utensil-wielding redneck (or was that supposed to be redskinned), and after reading one too many tag post apart anal sex, Butlerman has come back with a bang.

Of course, no one knows who's tagging what these days, certainly in the BATFORUM anyway. I've had people come up to me and ask me "So what have I been saying recently?" (How on bloody earth do I know. I don't keep records of everyone like the government does. Possibly the first and last piece of political humour you'll ever catch me saying)

This of course, makes tagging as pointless as... the Butterfly stroke, the purpose of which is nothing more than make other swimmers such as me who have some difficulty with the doggy paddle feel inferior. (I'm actually a passable swimmer. But pretending to be unable to swim does have its merits, especially on days when the female lifeguard on duty looks like something out of Baywatch).

And because I set about writing this blog post with absolutely no idea what to write about, I thankfully have several (two in fact) vomit-inducing puns to keep you (the one reader of this blog) entertained. This of course, would shatter whatever illusions of superhuman grandeur any of you held me in.

(1) First, there was the X-men. Now there's the Omen.

I shan't bother to write down the second one, for it's far worse than the first in my opinion, and I have no intentions of sinking that low... yet.

To the more observant follower of this blog (though we've already established there's only one. In which case I should have said "If you have noticed"), I've employed a different writing style this time around with quite a heavy influence from stand-up comedians... (Well it's a bit less stand-up comedy and a bit more sitting-down rambling).

TO THE BATMOBILE

posted by butler at 12:24 am
link |

0 Comments:

Want to Post a Comment?

back to main page