To the BATMOBILE

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

of facts and fancies

Much to all you readers' grave misfortune (and like the classic superheroes of old), this particular Butlerman just wouldn't lay down to die in peace. Instead, holding true to his traditional ang moh roots, he must kick up a fuss as if anyone bleeding cared.

Before we step any further into the misadventures of Butlerman's life (which I promise you would happen within the next one week or 52), let us take a painful look at several important truths we (or rather, I, the poor misguided alter-ego) would have to accept.

1) My once vaunted "creative thinking process" would struggle to match a Pentium 1 processor - a statement reinforced by my reliance on cheesy computer-geek jargon.
2) No one knows this blog exists anymore - a far cry from the ego-inflating, giddying heights of Butlerman's heyday where I had (God forbid) female fans.
3) You are only here reading at the behest of a poor disillusioned soul's final wish before he descends into a downward-spiralling miasma of a couch potato lifestyle.
4) The truth is out - I really have no six-pack to boast of, be it rock hard chiselled abdominal muscles or even illegally obtained beer.
5) Ronald McDonald remains a far greater choice as a significant other than I could hope to be (its just a matter of hoping that the people who matter don't find out).
6) I seem to be cursed with this Captain Planet hairstyle that no amount of hair wax/clay/gel/cement nor visits to the stylist can correct - resulting in my barely succeeding attempts to restrain myself from stabbing that stupid stylist with his own scissors for his incompetency.

And yes, lest we forget, this is Siglap/Marine Parade District's very own superhuman vigilante, Butlerman speaking from the comfort of his base of operations.

three cheers
TO THE BATMOBILE

posted by butler at 12:08 am
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